I like to take care of plants, even living in a house without garden in Amsterdam. Amongst others, I have a ‘Japanese Maple or Acer Palmatum’, which until two weeks ago, I had forgotten outside in the roof terrace, enduring below zero temperatures.
All leaves were gone and the branches looked very dry. After I brought it inside the house, when exposed to heating and the occasional sun light (plus a few words of apologies), it took only a few days to flourish again, as if it was spring.
Our actions towards fellow humans are not different. If we are careless and not attentive, we hurt them deeply. If we notice it, and take no action, we cause irreparable damage. If we do whatever we can, while still is time, we can still recover a relationship, a friendship, or even start a new one.
I am no philosopher nor like to give unwanted lessons to anyone. However, something happened yesterday that made me ponder.
A fellow blogger decided to quit because of the actions taken by a so-called Grammar Police, giving unsolicited advice while trashing people’s comments sections and making fun of the others commenters. Discussions about the Oxford Comma seem holier than the Pope. Intolerance, selfish interest, and insensitivity, are the new good behavior. Am I applying the Oxford Comma correctly?
I will leave you with three thoughts:
1. Although I regret to see her leaving, I accept and respect her decision. Each person has a unique sensitivity’s threshold to ‘what, how much and from whom’ to take offence. So, I don’t judge and nobody should judge her decision. We know better what affects us.
2. Most of you know that English is not my mother tongue. I am someone who loves grammar and has always excelled at it, but only in my mother tongue. Writing publicly in English is a challenge I don’t ever underestimate, and I do my best to not make mistakes. But I still do. If anyone corrects me, what has not yet happened, I am delighted to learn new things. I am not against corrections. Additionally, I think we should all strive to publish texts that are not sloppy and incomprehensible. The proofread is here to help.
3. However – now we come back to my Japanese Acer – if the one making the correction decides to trash my post, and those of my commenters, despite of the reasons that brought someone to act like that, I do not need to accept that. People have the choice to follow or not and to read trash (using own definition) or not. We all have the choice to ditch them out of our blogs as well.
I follow bloggers whose blog content interests and touches me. I don’t edit anyone’s comments. Who am I to do so? I am not the Grammar Queen. I look for meaning and not for grammar skills. I choose depth not shallowness. They may have a deep knowledge of English Grammar but their behavior is shallow.
The Grammar Police members might be conscious of their self-righteousness, but unconscious of what they might do to others. Do they see what they are doing? By having a limited view of the blogging experience, they miss the opportunity to learn from other’s ideas, which could have helped expanding their minds, and flourishing as better people.
Daily Post’s Weekly Photo Challenge is Depth. Whether visually or emotionally, this week, editor Ben Huberman asked us to dig (or dive) deep. This photo and words are my answer to it.
Stream of Consciousness prompt from LindaGHill is Scene/Seen. This post is also an answer to it.
Great post…I applaud you for standing up for your blogger friend. It is unfortunate that there are insane people out there, like you pointed out, selfish and even arrogant. However I believe that most people are decent, they are helpful and kind. So here is hoping that for every creep out there, there are a thousand people who will show kindness…
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Thank you. I totally agree with you and share the same hope.
I appreciated your comment and thank you also for reading the post.
Best wishes.
Lucile
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We discussed this and I am so happy that you so cleverly worked it into this prompt for depth. I love that! It’s exactly as you say – those people are simply shallow. They cannot make a meaningful comment about a topic, so they clutch onto the one thing that they do know. Bravo Lucile, lovely Lucile. Excellent post! And gorgeous images by the way… New lens? Love the creamy background x.
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Thanks much for your insights. You are absolutely spot on. Again. After our discussion I kept wondering what I should do about it.
Today while discussing the issue with hubby I had the idea to combine the photo challenge with it. It felt just right.
And yes, a new lens. LOL. I am following your footsteps.
Lots of experimentation with my poor plant today, and she was very well behaved. Glad you liked it.
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It’s a perfect post and response to a tiresome person’s comments.
The photos are lovely.
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😘
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I se depth in these pictures.
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Thank you, Betty Louise. Hope all is well with you.
Best wishes,
Lucile
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I feel some people must stand on someone’s back before they feel tall. I enjoy meeting people from around the world thru their blogs, photos. I forget the editing and open myself to ideas and interests that may be new to me. Love the internet but the anonimity does bring out some rude, obnoxious people.
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Hello Sue, thanks for commenting.
I appreciate, and agree with your wise words.
Best wishes,
Lucile
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Good grief! I hate to see this kind of behavior. 😦
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It is disgusting and it is just around the corner.
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We do not want those attitudes. We all must get along.
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No, we don’t. And we will continue getting along with the vast majority who do not behave like that.
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So true! I will always back you up on that!
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Heartfelt thanks, my lovely friend. People like you are precious, and make this blogosphere a worthy place to be. ❤️
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I feel the same about you Lucile. Thank you!
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😘 thank you!
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😚💖
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You are so right and I think it is wonderful that you show acceptance of other people’s sensitivity levels, because so many judge it to be the same as theirs. No one knows how someone else feels, how things effect them, the impact, and walking away sometimes is the answer, or a break or whatever.
I think there are trolls out there and unhappy people who find enjoyment in trashing other peoples posts and commenters, I have heard of it often but luckily not experienced it, it would stress me out a lot if such a disruptive thing happened.
Simply stunning photo btw and so glad it came back to life with your tlc x
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Thanks for the support Justine.
I am convinced that having a bit of empathy for other’s choices doesn’t cost us anything. And we don’t expect nor want to be judged by others either.
We are both lucky to not have experienced this situation yet. Knocking wood!
Thank you, fab lovely!
Xxx
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ah yes, knock on wood loudly lol.
A pleasure lovely lucile xxx
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❤
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This is a beautiful post. I admire your creativity tying it in with the weekly photo challenge and the perfect pictures.
I will miss Deborah too and I hope she finds her way back to us. I do understand her decision to take a break.
I’m still working on some sort of picture featuring depth….. 🙂
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Thanks much, Kat.
I hope so too. It’s a loss I’m still upset about its reasons.
Good luck with finding the image. I’m sure you will find a beautiful one.
Thanks for commenting, Kat.
Have a lovely week.
L
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I think there are people who thrive on being jerks, and the Grammar Nazis are among the worst. No one really gives a rat’s backside about the blasted Oxford comma, for one thing. For another, the rules of spelling and grammar in English, and I suspect in other languages, have been in a constant state of flux since long before I was born and will continue to mutate and change long after I’m gone. What’s important is whether or not you can be understood, and if someone says “He’s bigger than me!” instead of “He’s bigger than I!”, who the h-e-double hockey sticks cares? I know what the speaker means.
People who run around the Internet looking for minutia like spelling and grammar to be upset about need to get a life.
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John,
Thanks for your insightful comment. I appreciate it.
You synthesized the issue brilliantly and better than I could possible do.
People will learn a lot from your comment. Hopefully also the ones who need to get a life!
Best wishes.
Lucile
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Another brave post Lucile, and on a challenging subject from one of my favourite bloggers, you have weaved many different thoughts into this one. And I agree we all need to think about each other and as for the grammar police, the world really does not need that kind go behaviour…
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Ditto! And thank you so much! 😀
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I hate the grammar police, luckily they have not commented on my blog, should they do so, ill delete them and just report them for trolling. Sometimes I make mistakes in comments, if I could correct them I will (if I notice) but to pick people apart because they have not used a comma here or some other form of punctuation there, well, that is not on and I will make my feelings very well known to whomever decides to do it.
If I put up a short story and there is constructive criticism on it I am fine with that, it happened the other day on something I posted, I welcome that critique, but anything else I think is being nasty for the sake of being nasty.
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I’m deeply sorry I haven’t yet replied to your comment. I keep missing comments with this new notification system and have to get back to each post to see if I missed any.
We both have been lucky then. And I totally side with your comment. I guess I would do the sam en report them too.
Thanks for commenting. I do appreciate it. And apologies again.
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hi Lucille. I have my blog set up to email me when some one comments on my posts, this new notification thing is indeed a mess. Sadly it doesnt seem to email when Icoment on someone elses post like in this case.
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Hi. I have mine set like that too. But it is a one way process. I cannot really keep track of the comments I have yet to reply.
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You have actively demonstrated composure and class. And now I am gonna look up the Oxford comma.
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Thanks dear! You’re sweet. Don’t bother about the comma. Lol
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I wholeheartedly agre with your sentiments. I’m what you might call a grammar nerd, and yes, certain mistakes do bother me, but I would never point them out in such a nasty way, or at really, unless someone was asking for that. When we write on our blogs, and especially in comments, I don’t think it has to be perfect. Understandable, yes, but perfect, no/ There is no excuse for bullying, in any walk of life. And writing in a language that isn’t your native tongue? Brave you! I’d never even attempt it!
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I am happy to hear that. Luckily there are few people behaving like that.
I figure that there are many people who shy away from writing after receiving nasty comments. It is sad.
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